Jesus Christ!!! I'm still a Christian!

Us @ the Muttonbird

Moved by your sunrise and captured by your bright stars

They are much more than a bouquet of flowers

Or gifts of diamonds and jewelleries

 

The lapping of your ocean and the singing of your breeze

They are more to me than a love struck serenades

 

Your mountains magnificent both above and below

Houses the solid and liquid snow

 

I felt your ocean breathing from the top

Sleepily heavily almost yawning

I close my eyes and felt it sway me

Moving me lazily

 

Your breeze and her waves in a gently rythmic dance

So close I feel their pulses

You are so ever near me

My whole being can't escape you

 

You are everything I need

More than any of my desires

 

I have loved both man and woman

For in them I have found your great beauty

But now our spirits have become one

You have taken my heart, soul and mind

 

Every bit of my breath and strength is yours

I belong to you forever

Think on these

WHAT MATTERS TO YOU?

WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE WITH?

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?

My Jetty Walk

God’s Nature is part of me, part of all of us.  It is life and brings a life-force to us because God encompasses all.  He is the all-consuming presence that surrounds us, His breath within every living thing for He is the Great Creator.  I feel God more outside of the four walls of any religious infrastructure.  His presence I feel strongly when I am one with nature than with people.  People have a lot of invisible baggage that they carry around with them that they unknowingly transmit to others.  The nature doesn’t do that – it’s pure and giving, its power is real because the source is God who gives and takes away.  This personal conviction is reinforced by a brief but profound experience I had recently.  I felt His seashores calling me in my hour of need and I yielded.  At that moment of connection, my spirit was again compelled to write JC another love letter:

YOU COME TO ME LIKE THE GENTLE OCEAN TIDE

WASHING MY CARES AWAY,

I FEEL YOU PLANT THE SOLES OF MY FEET

I WALK FIRMLY ON YOUR SANDS BENEATH.

 

YOU DELIGHT ME WITH YOUR DELICATE SEA CREATURES,

THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL AND INTRICATE – DEBRIS FROM THE OCEAN FLOOR.

IT WAITED THERE PATIENTLY FOR ME,

THEIR PURPOSE TO BRING IN THE MORNING SMILE AND TO FOSTER

THIS SOUL’S DIMINISHING HOPE.

YOU’VE HEARD MY HEART’S FAINTEST WHIMPERS,

YOU ARE THERE IN MY DEEPEST NEED.

YOU MAKE MY SPIRIT GLAD,

YOUR GREAT LOVE FOREVER MINE.

 

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble”.  Psalm 46:1

Fences

I was sitting at the verandah of the house at Corindi Beach just looking at the houses at the back of the property.  Each house has a fence or some sort of a border around it.  It’s strange that I suddenly felt that this whole world is restricting.  I then remembered what a good friend of mine had once said…the systems that we created in this world and for the inhabitants of this world are senseless and sometimes pointless.  I didn't understand what he had said then but now I think I do. 

The universe above is expansive, borderless and seemingly infinite and here I am wondering how on earth did we ever get to this point that we had to put fences around our houses, pay someone for a piece of land that could never be truly yours (because we all die and the minerals underneath belongs to the government), and worked on average 30 years of your life paying for a small piece of land and a piece of cardboard plonked on it.  We succumbed into this earthly system duped into thinking that we are doing something for eternity when you can't predict tomorrow.  I then started looking at my own life, how hard I have worked in order to provide to the detriment of my own relationships.  I now look at this world differently, the material now seemed pointless.  The true beauty that of this world is what the Creator has given everyone for free: the white mountain peaks, the blue green ocean, the milky lakes, the northern and southern lights, the red monolith, the rainbows, the orange sunrise, the lush grass, the energy of the cascading falls, the fruits from the trees, the flower blossoms, the laughter of the child, the hugs and cuddles, the time spent with someone special, the death of JC on the cross…they are priceless and they are for free.  And yet we have deceived ourselves that we could buy happiness from the temporal things of this world.

I remember what Uncle Bob Randall had mentioned in the video ‘Kanyini’ - the land that we walk on is free, it belongs to everyone.  We share from its’ produce, we look after it by letting it rest to give it time to replenish itself then we come back to it and enjoy what it freely gives us.  We don’t take everything but only what we need. 

Looking around me, the fences tells me that this is my property, I will share it if I want to but warn people to keep off it.  The boundaries are made to repel others.  It’s my little piece of paradise or is it?  It’s actually my little piece of liability just to make my life miserable that I have to work hard all my life to pay for and then subject the next generation to pay for my debt should I die suddenly without an insurance.  Oh, the insurance is not free.  People work so hard that they couldn’t enjoy spending time with their children.  I have spent most of my time working for what isn’t free instead of being with my girls and enjoy the beauty of this world that are given for free.  I have subjected myself to a rotten system.

The system tells us this is what it should be so we put on a mask, a façade, a monkey suit and act the role that the system had set.  We become professional actors.  Some have immersed themselves in the role and had made it their identity, losing who they really are.  And most of us have surrendered to that system, giving it permission to mould us and direct us.  Some of us do not know any other way and although some may do, their choice is restricted by yet another system.  Those who are wiser have use the system to work for them and they are rewarded, some move on and succumbed themselves to another.  We are stuck except for those little choices that we could make.  And some of those little choices have spelt for us a whole heap of trouble because we have pushed the boundaries – we have moved the system’s fence.

So much of what is in this world is the antithesis of who God is:  His infinite and borderless love.  The love that knows no fence, no limits, the love that does not repel but invites.  The love that draws people - any person, any race, any colour, the good and the bad for He makes the sun shines on both.  The love that gives, that forgives, that heals.  The love that says His mercies are new every morning.  The love that extends from east to the west.  The love that starts each day that says ‘I am your Bright Morning Star’ and ends with ‘I am the Southern Cross Star next to you’.  JC lived a simple life and that is exactly what I want to do. 

JC's Ocean (Dusk Version)

His Ocean at Dusk

The sun mellows on the surf's horizon
Its light rays streaming through the clouds
From afar the wind brings forth
Farewell tones of the old Earth's voice

The rain comes down across the water's slate
My lips taste the salt on His ocean's plate
My body in His sea embrace
Beneath my feet His finger trails

His breaks rushes and welcomes me
A breathtaking mix of fear and glee
I descend through His glassy depths
His silky waters cover my head

His great waves comes and carries me
With pure elation He graces me
His world, now had become so mine,
Two spirits, inter-twined

And as this life of adventure roll,
I'll come to His ocean at dusk
When He calls

JC's Ocean (Dawn Version)

His Ocean at Dawn

The sun mellows on the surf's horizon
Its morning rays beams through the clouds
From afar the wind brings forth
Choruses of Earth's rejoice

The rain comes down across the water's slate
My lips taste the salt on His ocean's plate
My body in His sea embrace
Beneath my feet His finger trails

His breaks rushes and welcomes me
A breathtaking mix of fear and glee
I descend through His glassy depths
His silky waters cover my head

His great waves comes and carries me
With pure elation He graces me
His world, now had become so mine,
Two spirits, inter-twined

And when at last the evening, had outgrown
I hear Him call me to His ocean, at dawn

Faithful

 

Their Bible Tells Me So

They think they have all the right answers

They think they have all the right formulas

They think they have all the right recipes

 

Their right answers starts with - You shouldn’t

Their right formula starts with - You shouldn’t

Their right recipes start with - You shouldn’t

 

Why can’t they just listen?

They don’t have to tell me it’s sad

They don’t have to tell me I’m bad

They don’t have to tell me I’m wrong

 

Coz’ I already know it’s sad

Coz’ I already know I’m bad

Coz’ I already know I’m wrong

Because their Bible tells me so

JC - My story ends with you

Whatever I may do Lord
And whatever I may say
I belong to you only
In your perfect plan I will stay

I may fall a thousand times
And fail you a thousand more
Again I will rise up with my eyes
Fixed upon that prize

Though broken I may be
And there is nothing good in me
It's your love that will cover me
Your faithfulness and mercy shall
always follow me

I trust you with my heart
My life is in your hands
Hold me together Lord
For you alone are my God

Remember what you have become to me
Though my life ebbs and flows
You know what to do with me
There's no thwarting of your purpose

The Stand

Far, far away....

in a library somewhere, you’ll hear a quiet conversation that went something like this…..


[Emdee was silently reading from the World Scripture book]

Emdee: ‘Truth has many aspects. Infinite truth has infinite expressions. Though the sages speak in diverse ways, they express one and the same Truth’.

Emdee: But JC said ‘I am the way, the Truth and life!’

DOC: Do you believe in what JC said?

Emdee: Yes!

DOC: That’s good, so what’s wrong?

Emdee: Nothing wrong with what I believe, it’s them who don’t believe!

DOC: So what are you going to do? Shoot them? Ostracize them? Colonise them? Debate with them? Force them? Remember what Jesus’ comments were after his overly zealous disciples asked if they should call on fire to come down from heaven and consume those that didn’t receive them?

Emdee: No.

DOC: Jesus rebuked them. Read up Luke 9:51-56. Then Paul says in 2 Timothy 2:14-15 not to debate or strive about words to no profit, to the ruin of the hearers.

DOC: If you are rightly dividing the truth, then you need not be ashamed but that doesn’t imply that you force them on someone because that goes against how God created mankind in the first place. He created us with a free will. He gave everyone a choice to love or to reject Him. Why force someone to do anything?

Emdee: I don’t understand…

DOC: What is it that worries you Emdee? If the Bible speaks of Christ’s supremacy in Ephesians 1, that He is above all things and everything is under His feet and the Bible is inerrant, what’s the struggle then? Jesus said in John 6:44, no one can come to Him unless the Father draws that person, so it’s not really up to you is it? Jesus had made it plain, our job is to heed to the greatest commandment of God. Mark 12:30-31 says to love God with all our heart, soul, mind and strength and love others as you love yourself. All the commandments hang on these. Don’t make it complicated.

Emdee: Actually I don’t exactly know what that passage really means…

DOC: It means to love God with all that you are including loving God in all that you do. I think that’s what it means when the Apostle Peter said in 1 Peter 3:15-16 sanctify the Lord God in your heart. It means setting God apart, like putting Him on a pedestal. In practical terms, it just means He becomes the centre of your life, your desires, your motivations, your will. Basically your everything!

When you get the first bit right, loving others as yourself becomes natural and easy and this is what will draw people towards Christ. You start to create love and peace which are characteristic of children of God, just as how it was described in Matthew 5:9. It’s not what you do on your own ability but it’s Christ in you working His will in people’s lives. And because you’ve become so engrossed with loving God, His love will just flow and people will start to respond without you batting an eyelash and taking credit for it.

Emdee: But isn’t loving means telling someone the right way so they don’t end up in hell?

DOC: There are other ways of loving people. These days it is not so much about what you say that matters. Reminds me of what St. Francis of Assisi had said, …’preach the gospel at all times, and if necessary use words’. Tell me Emdee, if you are preaching because you fear for their future and they don’t accept what you say, what is that to you?

Emdee: Then they will end up in hell! They need to be saved!

DOC: If they end up in hell what can you do?

Emdee: Hmm, not much.

DOC: Then it’s not really up to you then is it? Try not to complicate things. Make the main thing the main thing. Heed to the greatest commandment of all. I told you Jesus had made it really plain.

The mind and JC

An old friend of mine once said something about the intricacy of working as a Christian in academia.  It was in the similar line of thought wherein science and religion doesn’t mix.  This really bothered me and caused me a lot of anxiety and sleepless nights. 

Here I am loving Jesus with all my heart, my soul and my mind and working in a place where this lifestyle is relatively alien.  Take note of the last area that I have finally surrendered to Him - mind.  Anyone who works in academia knows the ’intellectual’ activities required in this type of work. 

The last time I felt ‘iffy’ about my spirituality was when I was studying Masters in Theology several years ago.  I came unprepared for the battering of my own spirituality when what I thought I knew was right started to get challenged and when uncomfortable questions about my spirituality started to surface.  Learning from my fellow learners the perils of studying theology further increased my discomfort.  I opted for the easy way out and went back to where I was comfortable. 

Now, here I am with the same feeling of ‘iffyness’, I decided to face my fear. 

Jesus surpasses all understanding, He knows the way around the human mind.  But He does it with gentleness and humility, not imposing and domineering one’s free will.  He gives choice, He allows you to think - that is how He made us.  We are rational beings.  We argue, we discuss, we look for solutions, we analyse. 

He respects what He has created - us who were made in His image.  He is able to draw everyone but also has the power to allow blindness in people's heart because of stubbornness.  He says that He allowed this to demonstrate His knowledge, He is the beginning and the end.  He knows those that will come and those that will not, those that will listen and those who will chose to remain faithless.  Classic example of our fickleness is Judas.  How could anyone that walked with the Son of God betray Him?  I have yet to find out if there was redemption for Judas.  And what about Lucifer? How could anyone that had come from the throne of God, considered the son of morning light, beautiful and perfect rebelled against the Most High?  God had allowed it, that’s how much He respects His creation.